"Loving, Kind, Patient."

PATIENCE...uh...oh...

I think I missed where we signed up for that.

Who possesses saintlike patience? Does anyone? I think very few of us - if we are being honest.

We get frustrated with people, with everyday situations, with ourselves.

I know in my life, if I’m really trying to focus on something (super hard for me to begin with), and my husband interrupts me, I lose patience very quickly.

Frustration just blows up out of nowhere, and I momentarily forget my love, and just want him not to bug me!

We can see impatience a lot in ourselves and in others. (it seems right now especially as we navigate COVID)

And it can cause harm — it can hurt other people who just want our attention, it can hurt our relationship with people we care about. So what can we do? There is a practice I love that I’ve found truly helpful when I’m frustrated or losing patience.

It’s called “loving-kindness practice.” 

Here is how you do it

• Sit in quietly, and think of someone you love wholeheartedly, in an uncomplicated way — a child...a really good friend...a pet...

• Think about this person, think to yourself, “May they be happy.” Simply wish for their happiness, from a place in your heart.

• Notice the place in your heart where this loving-kindness feeling comes from.

You can do this practice for anyone. What’s the point of this? You’re cultivating loving-kindness, which can be used when you’re losing patience.

A Patience Practice: (try this when you’re losing patience)

• Notice that you’re frustrated or feeling impatient.

• Notice the stress that you feel as a result of clinging to the way you want things to be.

• Give yourself some loving-kindness. Simply wish for yourself to be happy.

• Do the same for the other person, who you are losing patience with.

I also find it useful to try to practice gratitude towards that other person — why am I grateful to have them in my life? It’s easy to focus on the inconsiderate thing we think they are guilty of, but what good qualities do they have? How can I see the loving heart that they have?  This is a beautiful tool to have in your mindfulness tool kit :)

Peace & hugs xxx

Bobbie